Journal from May 2011

Today’s devotional talks of doing things different: “throw your net on the right side.”  There are many things I need to do differently: money management, weight loss, relationships, teaching, being a mommy.  I guess that is just about everything!  

Lord, I also need to go about talking with you differently!!!!  I just ask and then listen for about 30 seconds and then move on.  Then during the day, I don’t stop and listen to you, I let the world get between us, and you are probably talking to me, but I can’t hear you, because of all the interference.  I know you will help me, when I ask, and I am asking now, but I, also, know that I have to be willing to stop during the day, and listen.  Quiet the interference, and listen to the Lord.  One of the men in Sunday School on Sunday, said it is hard to live a life listening to You.  That it is easy to live away from you.  I didn’t say anything at the time, but YES IT IS.  It is so much easier to live throwing out a token to you.  It makes us think that we are doing enough, but you are not doing anything.  We say we cannot hear you, so you must not be talking.  Maybe you don’t even hear us, so why even talk to you?  That is NOT the life I want to live.  It is the easier life, but life is not always easy, and I know that the life you have for me is SOOOO MUCH better than ANYTHING I could ever imagine!  Yes, Lord, I want your help in my daily life, from moment to moment, but I KNOW that I HAVE TO CHANGE MY WAY FIRST.  I need to be able to be still and listen, to ground myself EVERYDAY in Your word.  To take time with you, to talk with you, to listen to you, to bask in your love for me, to honor you, to obey you, to trust you, and to love you with all I have and am!!!!!!!!!

I can say “starting now”, or I can just do it.  I know I will stumble, I know I will not succeed the first time I try, but I must keep trying until I get it right.  That is the only way that I am going live life to YOUR FULLEST FOR ME! And to receive ALL THE BLESSINGS you have for me!!!!  So, Lord, I know you are reaching out to me, and I am going to keep trying to reach out to you, and we will meet on your Holy ground!!!

AMEN!

Study of Zechariah (book of the Bible)

Zechariah 1:3-6:


3The first message the Lord sent Zechariah: ' Return to me and I will return to you.  Don't be like your ancestors who would not listen or pay attention.  Turn from your evil ways and stop all your evil practices.'


     We have to each be our own person.  It does not matter how we are raised or who our families are.       We are each responsible for our own actions.  We know, even if it is deep, down inside... we know what is right and wrong.  We must stop doing the things we know are wrong - against ourselves, against others, and against God.


5Everything I said through prophets happened.  Because of this your ancestors repented and said 'We have received what we deserved.  He has done what he said he would do.'


     The Lord has said that evil will punished.  We know the penalty of sin is death.  Even from the first sin of Adam and Eve: they would have lived with God on earth forever, but then they went against God, they eventually had to die.  Jesus was the last sacrificial death for sin.  He took all sin and died for it.  We, however, cannot continue to knowingly sin.  When we sin (and EVERYONE sins) we must repent, ask for forgiveness, forgive ourselves and learn not to commit that sin again.  It is hard and EVERYONE will fall again and again, but that is the beauty of Jesus!  He died for ALL sin.  However, if we keep sinning over and over and not repenting and not learning, we move farther from God and Jesus.  God has said EVERYONE will stand before him to be judged.  I don't know about you, but I want Jesus, the one who loved me so much he died for me, as my lawyer, defending me!!


The words in black are paraphrased from the Tyndale Life Application Study Bible, New Living Translation.  The words in purple are written by Lisa Anne Thomas.
                          

One day our life can be full of the unexpected: stress, worry, things not going our way;  the next day, we can sail right through everything - having everything work out the way we think it should, no stress, no worry, maybe even getting an unexpected letter or email from an old friend.  Everyday, should be a sailing day.  Especially those days that are full of the unexpected.  We need to remember that God is always in control!  No matter if we didn’t get the job we really wanted, or that we are running short of money this month, or even if our children did not act very good at daycare.  God has a plan for everyone and everything, and yes, we wish he would tell us, so we didn’t worry and wonder, however, that is what faith is for.  To give us hope, that the future is still in God’s hands, and no matter what, He is working to make EVERYTHING good for us.  So in the middle of your unexpected day, take a deep breath, remind yourself that God is still in control, and ask God to show you what He wants you to do right at this moment.

“I know the plans I have for you,” declares God.  “Plans to prosper, not harm.  Plans to give you hope and a future.”

Dear Santa

Dear Santa, 
I know you are real!!!! I see you everyday!!!  Some call you Santa, Chris Kringle, or St. Nick;  I call you Jesus. The spirit of Santa is the same as Jesus.  Giving hope and gifts to everyone!!!  I have a request this year.  It is a little backwards compared to other requests like this.  I watch all the Christmas movies, and all the kids are asking for a husband or wife for their single parent.  I am asking for a father for my son!!  He needs a constant, positive male figure in his life.  He has several male role models, but none are with him on a daily basis.  


If you would like to deliver this present before Christmas, that would be great!!  (Oh, and yes, we have to be completely in love also!!!!)


Thanks in advance for this present!!!


Love to you, Mrs. Clause, and all the reindeer and elves, 
Lisa :-)

Part Two - A God for Everyone

“Come on, Jeremy!  It is the biggest even in fall!  You have to go with me,” cried Emily.  “I am on the Homecoming Court and I want my boyfriend to be there and walk me onto the field!”

“I’m sorry Emily, but Mom and Dad won’t let me go.  You know I am grounded because of that F.”

“Yeah, I know, ‘cause my boyfriend has not been able to go out for a month.  In fact, I don’t think I even have a boyfriend anymore,” Emily spat out.

“Come on, Em.”  Jeremy reached his hand out to touch Emily’s arm, as she turned away in a huff.  “Come on, Em! Don’t do this!”  Emily flounced away just as the tardy bell rang. Great, thought Jeremy, just what I need; to be late to Ms. Hudson’s class.  She’ll tell Coach, then Dad will find out, and I will be grounded until Christmas.

   

                                                  ***

“The 2009 Harvey High Homecoming Queen is Head Cheerleader, Emily Cooper, escorted by Harvey High Quarterback, Timothy Garner.”  As the announcement came across the P.A. system, the crowd went wild with cheers and yells.  

Emily couldn’t help but think about Jeremy and wish he was here.  No, she thought, it’s over.  Her smile was energetic, as she received the crown and flowers that were part of the homecoming tradition.  Just then Tim leaned down and planted a kiss on her lips.  Emily was startled and when she looked at Tim, she saw something strange in his eyes. 

As they walked off the field, waving, Tim said, “More of that after the dance. I gotta go, Coach will kill me if I don’t get back to the team.”  

They had reached the track that ran along the outskirts of the field.  Tim ran off toward the field house, where the home team locker room was.  His cleats making noise on the wooden boards protecting the track.

Emily just kept smiling.  Tim’s comment going in one ear and out the other.  She knew nothing would happen tonight.  She had never gone further than kissing any boy, and her heart still belonged to Jeremy.

                                                                                  

                                              ***

“Here ya go, Em,” Tim yelled over the loud music playing at the Homecoming Dance.  Emily turned around and took the punch Tim handed her.  

“Thanks,” Emily mumbled.  She didn’t feel very will.  Her head was starting to hurt and she felt dizzy.  As she tilted to the left, she bumped into Ms. Hudson.  

“Emily, are you okay?” Ms. Hudson asked with a concerned look on her face.

“Yeah, Ms. Hudson,” Tim answered for Emily.  “She’s just hot.  I will take her outside and get her some air.”

“Great idea.  This gym has always been hot during dances.”

Tim took Emily’s arm and steered her toward the side door that backed up to the stadium.

“Tim, I’m not feeling so good.  I think I need to go home.” Emily was startled to hear her words slurring.

“Don’t worry, Em.  I’ll take care of you.  You’ll feel better with some fresh air.”

Tim led Emily to his jet black Jeep, put her in the front seat, and buckled her in.  Then he walked around the front of the Jeep and got in the driver’s side.  As he pulled out of the school, he looked over at Emily.  Her head was leaned back and her eyes were closed.  Instead of turning toward her house, he turned toward the lake.  Once at the lake, he took the black soft top off the Jeep.  The only light was the full moon shining in the sky, reflecting off the water; the only sounds were the crickets and the small waves of the lake hitting the shore. 

An hour later, Tim passed Harvey High on his way to Emily’s house.  He was very disappointed.  She did not get into it as he had hoped.  He had heard that she was a virgin, but he could have sworn that Jeremy had gotten a piece of her.  Now, though, he was not so sure.  He would have to thank that guy in Senior English for giving him that pill to put in Emily’s first cup of punch.  

Book or No Book?

Someone posted on Facebook - What would you do if you had no fear?  That is an excellent question!  I would write a book.  I have some pages already, but it is not even close to being finished!  My dream is to have a place where I can help foster children and foster parents.  I have a picture in my mind, and I know it can happen, if I just get out there and do things.  Fostering is important to me, as I have adopted one of my 9 foster children.  I am going to post a few pages over the next few days of the book I have started.  I would LOVE honest feedback!!  Please post if you do or don't like the story.

Jeremy was furious, at the Coach Hudson, at his mom and dad, and, if he was honest, at himself.  So what if he failed history, who cares about what happened 100 years ago.  All Jeremy cared about was making sure his team won at football, running faster and better than everyone on the track, and Emily.  His Emily, head cheerleader, blonde, blue-eyed, and gorgeous.  Now, though, he would not be able to care about any of those things. 

“Great! Just because I failed one stupid class, I have to work with the retards,” Jeremy yelled.

“Jeremy, don’t raise your voice in this house,” his father calmly stated.

“Jeremy Blackstock! Don’t let me ever hear that word come out of your mouth.” His mother looked astonished.

“What ‘stupid’?”

“Jeremy you know what word your mother is talking about and stop being smart with us.”

Right at that moment, Jennifer, Jeremy’s older sister walks in the room singing a song from the church service the past Sunday.

“See what I mean, she’s so retarded she is singing to herself.” Jeremy turns around, and runs out the front door, slamming it as he leaves.  

“John!?” Julia Blackstock stands beside her husband with a worried look on her face, watching for Jennifer’s reaction.
Jennifer looks around the room slowly, seeing her parents, and Coach Hudson. 

“Hi, Coach!  Where’s Ms. Hudson?”

Steve Hudson’s heart catches in his chest for a second until he realizes Jennifer is talking about his daughter.  Five years after the accident, there are times when he forgets his beloved wife is gone. Shaking his head, he says, 

“Oh, Anna is at home tonight, Jennifer, but she is looking forward to school starting.  Are you?”

“Yep, I can’t wait to see my friends.”  Jennifer walks toward the kitchen. “Mom, can I have some ice cream?”

Will and Barbara Blackstock look at each other, glad that Jennifer did not pick up on what her brother said about her and her classmates.  

I look forward to hearing ALL feedback!  

God has chosen me and you!!!!!

God has chosen me to do things for him. He has called me. ME? ME! ME!?! It is a scary thought that God has chosen me to do anything with my past. and possibly my future. But he has, and he knows what he is doing. He has given me talents and opportunities that he has not given anyone else, and by me not doing them an using them, I am disrespecting God. And that is the last thing I want to do!! He also wants to search my heart and find a heart like his. This is hard to wrap my mind around, because of all the things I have done in my past, and because humans are so far away from being perfect that somethings I want to forget, I am reminded by, either of my own accord, or someone keeps reminding. It gets very frustrating and makes it hard to remember that no matter what, God loves us and will forgive us. He knows us, our past our future and our present. If he can see all that time and find something to love about each us, shouldn’t we too!!